The move from classifying yourself as “out of a relationship” to “being single” can be a rollercoaster. But somewhere along the way, you’ll identify little markers that let you know that you’re definitely on the mend.
No urgent need to return her calls
You hated to miss her calls. No matter what you were doing you would stop and answer. You even apologized when she didn’t you live because you felt it wasn’t right somehow. But when you see that she’s calling or texting you, that sense of urgency is gone. You don’t need to feel guilt about hitting the ‘Reject” button.
You no longer blame him
Breakups are bitter business. Your penchant for spiteful comments becomes heightened after a while until one day you realize that the fact that he’s taking up too much of your life, your conversations and he’s no longer in the picture makes no sense. You finally admit your responsibility in the relationship and that bitterness only makes you sour; who wants to hang out with someone like that?
You don’t compare your new girl to your ex
When you’re just getting back into the dating game, everything a new girl does reminds you of your ex. Worse yet, you actually admit it to her. When you’re interested in learning more about this new person sitting in front of you than being tempted to compare her every look and action to your ex, you’re definitely over her and ready to be yourself.
Running into him doesn’t hurt
Running into him on the street, in a coffee shop, sharing awkward niceties can hurt especially if you’re still hoping he’ll see sense and come back to you. When you’re busy living your life and finding your happiness again, you’ll worry less about him coming back and more about planning your life. So when you do run into him, you can confidently share a quick casual conversation with him and barely feel a sting.
You stop keeping tabs on her
Whether you realized it or not, you were in a race to see who’s ‘over it” the fastest; the problem is it’s a race of one. Keeping tabs and trying to see who’s happiest can be exhausting and take you away from really being happy. When you stop caring more about what she’s doing and with whom, you’re over her.
You say No without guilt
Hanging out was an obligation in many ways and saying ‘no’ made you feel like you had just kicked the dog. But when you’re done and over with him, you find a lot more room for other things in your life and less room for him. So ‘no’ to him means ‘yes’ to you.
You knew it just wasn’t meant to be – One of the best feelings
It’s not easy to get through a break up but when you’ve come out of the other side and realize that there really is something and someone better for you, it puts you a peace and leaves plenty of room for that right opportunity to find you.
Readers Bureau Contributor